Discover the proper way to choose wedding gifts, including the appropriate amount to spend on cash gifts for weddings.
By Monica Mercuri and Jennifer Prince
Last updated March 14, 2025
Key points in this article:
Explore recommendations for the budget of wedding gifts depending on your connection with the couple and the number of wedding occasions you attend.
When giving a gift, emphasize the sentimental value rather than the cost to express your gratitude to the couple.
It’s important to consider your relationship with the couple when choosing a wedding gift. Close family members or lifelong friends may opt for a more expensive or personalized gift, while distant relatives or acquaintances may choose something more modest.
If you are attending multiple wedding events for the same couple, it’s not necessary to bring a gift to each one. It’s acceptable to give a larger gift at the main wedding ceremony or reception, and a smaller token gift at other events such as bridal showers or engagement parties.
Remember, the thought and effort you put into selecting a gift are what truly matter. Personalized or handmade gifts can be just as meaningful, if not more so, than expensive store-bought items.
It’s important to remember that these are just general guidelines and the most important thing is to give a gift from the heart. If you’re on a tight budget, consider giving a thoughtful handmade gift or offering your services to help with wedding preparations. And if you’re still unsure about how much to spend, don’t be afraid to ask other guests or the couple themselves for guidance. Ultimately, what matters most is celebrating the love and happiness of the newlyweds!
Why You Don’t Need to Match the Cost Per Plate
Avoid adhering to outdated advice that recommends matching gift value to the cost per plate at the wedding reception.
- Respect the couple’s privacy by refraining from asking about their wedding expenses.
- Select a gift based on your relationship with the couple, not their catering budget.
- Concentrate on celebrating the couple’s special day rather than focusing on the value of the gift.
Cash Wedding Gifts
Best Practices for Giving Cash
Consider contributing to cash funds on the couple’s registry for their honeymoon, new home, or future plans.
- Contribute through the couple’s registry if possible.
- Mail checks before the wedding day for convenience.
- Address checks to one person using their pre-marriage names to avoid issues.
Group Wedding Gifts
Coordinate with other guests to give a high-value item by utilizing Zola’s group gifting feature.
- Ensure each person contributes the amount they would spend individually.
- Each adult within a large family should present their own gift.
Off-Registry Gifts
When all registry items are acquired, opt for an off-registry gift that reflects your trust in the couple’s taste.
- Ask the couple for specific gift suggestions.
- Contribute to a cash fund or provide cash directly.
- Include a gift receipt for easy returns or exchanges.
Special Wedding Situations
Consider your bond with the couple and your financial position when deciding on the necessity of a gift.
Attending a destination wedding may warrant adjusting your gift amount due to travel costs.
Confirm plus-one arrangements with the couple and adapt the gift amount accordingly.
Wedding Gift Budgeting
Distribute your gift budget across various wedding events to manage expenses efficiently.
- Allocate 20% for the engagement gift, 20% for the bridal shower, and 60% for the wedding.
Gift-Giving Etiquette
Determine when to present a gift based on the event and the nature of the chosen gift.
- Deliver wrapped gifts to showers, engagement parties, or non-registry gifts.
- Mail registry gifts such as cash or checks before the wedding day.
Zola benefit: Couples can choose their preferred gift receipt timing, ensuring convenience for both guests and themselves.
Timely Gift Giving
Acquire and dispatch gifts before or shortly following the wedding to ensure prompt receipt and efficient management of thank you notes.
Wedding Gift Adjustments
Alternative Gift Options
If finances are limited, contemplate offering services or creative gifts to support the couple during this special period.
Explore meaningful ways to contribute to the couple’s wedding experience without causing financial strain.
- Have a beautiful garden? Offer the couple a monthly supply of fresh-cut flowers from your garden during peak season.
- Skilled in handiwork? Propose to assist the couple in preparing their new home. Any service within your expertise works and will help them save on hiring external help.
- Love animals? Provide pet-sitting services during their honeymoon or annual family vacation. Spend extra time with their pets while they’re away.
Is it ever appropriate to ask the couple how much to spend on a wedding gift?
Avoid querying about the amount to spend on the couple. Check their registry and adhere to the general guidelines provided above.
So, how much should I spend on a wedding gift?
The decision on how much to give for a wedding gift is at your discretion and based on your relationship with the couple. Typically, $100-$200 (per person) is suitable. If this poses difficulty, contemplate whether the couple would prefer your presence to celebrate.
Understanding how much to allocate for a wedding gift can be daunting, especially if you’re invited to every event from the engagement party to the wedding.
Rest assured that the couple desires your presence to celebrate. Give generously and joyfully. Discover more about registries or a couple’s wish list on Zola’s wedding registry section.
Copy link lightning bolt icon An icon in the shape of a lightning bolt.
This narrative is only accessible to Business Insider subscribers. Become an Insider now and commence reading. Already have an account? Log in.
- Giving and receiving wedding gifts has become intricate.
- Experts advocate for understanding; brides argue that cards should be customary.
Brooke Bowman Boone, 29, tied the knot in January, and 27 guests did not bring a gift. Giving and receiving wedding gifts has become a complex matter.
Wedding guests are confused and overwhelmed
My colleagues and I were murmuring about the busy wedding season when we stumbled upon the topic of gifts. Some were giving $300 in cash alongside registry presents, while others opted for $100 bills placed in cards.
There is uncertainty on social media regarding giving cash or registry items at weddings.
Experts indicate that the modern “inflation of the wedding process” has led to ambiguity about gifting norms.
It is important for guests to consider the couple’s preferences and financial situation when deciding on a gift. While cash is often seen as a practical and versatile option, registry items can show thoughtfulness and consideration for the couple’s wishes.
Ultimately, the most important thing is to give a gift with sincerity and good intentions, regardless of the form it takes. Communication between guests and the couple can also help alleviate any confusion or uncertainty surrounding wedding gifts.
Related stories
Business Insider tells the innovative stories you want to know
Business Insider tells the innovative stories you want to know
Weddings have become more extravagant and costly for guests. Many incur debt to attend weddings, encompassing multiple occasions, ceremonies, and receptions.
Gifts are pricey; the average wedding attendee spends $150 on a gift, as per The Knot.
Brides say they’re getting the short end of the stick
Bowman Boone requested guests to contribute to a honeymoon fund. The effort of the guests mattered most.
It was disappointing when several family members and guests arrived without cards.
Some guests opt not to present gifts, which can perturb couples.
There’s a solution, and both parties have a role
Couples should consider the expense of attending a wedding. Guests should give within their means, without adhering to societal norms.
Establishing rational boundaries around finances is crucial when attending weddings.
Handcraft a gift or offer a card if traveling to attend a wedding.
Most importantly, couples desire guests to share in their excitement.
As wedding invitations accumulate, you may wonder about your total expenditure. Two-thirds of Americans are uncertain about the appropriate amount to spend on a wedding gift.
Don’t let the confusion surrounding wedding gifts deter you from celebrating. Consider five essential factors to make confident gift choices.
1) Traditional etiquette
Conventional etiquette advises that guests should present a gift equivalent in value to their plate at the reception. Choose a gift that aligns with your personal values and financial circumstances.
Another traditional rule of wedding gift etiquette is to give a gift of a similar value to what the couple gave you at your wedding, only if you are already married and they attended your wedding.
2) Your relationship with the couple
When selecting a gift, consider your closeness to the couple. Spend less for new or casual acquaintances and more for close friends. The average wedding gift falls between $50 to $100, so stick to the lower end for distant co-workers or college friends, and contemplate spending more, such as $150 or above, for closer friends.
3) The cost to attend the wedding
Attending a wedding can already be costly with travel, accommodations, and attire expenses. If you are spending a significant amount to attend, it’s acceptable to reduce the gift amount. Remember, your presence is a gift in itself, so include all costs when determining a gift budget.
4) Other gifts you’re giving the couple
Factor in other events like bridal showers, bachelor parties, or engagement parties where you may have given gifts. Adjust your wedding gift budget based on what you have already spent on earlier celebrations.
5) Your financial situation
Understand your financial state before selecting a gift. Avoid overspending. Gifts need not be lavish—consider a group gift with other wedding guests or create a heartfelt, personalized gift instead of purchasing from a store.
Remember, a wedding is about celebrating with the couple, and your presence matters more than the gift you give.
Want to stay informed?
Get the latest money news delivered to your inbox weekly. Subscribe for updates, newsletters, and offers from Empower.
Recent Articles
Average retirement savings by age
Explore the average retirement savings by age and the significance of personalized planning for your financial future.
Tariffs hit the beach: Americans brace for $10K+ vacation budgets in 2025
Tariffs are impacting summer spending, with prices for beach day essentials anticipated to rise by up to 68%.
Becoming the 401(k) millionaire next door
The number of retirement millionaires is increasing, with 9.1% of Americans now fitting into this category.
The Currency editors
Stay informed about financial news and trends through The Currency™, a publication from Empower. Learn about planning, saving, and investment strategies for life.
Important Notice: The content provided in this article is intended for informational purposes only and is not to be construed as legal, tax, accounting, or investment advice. It is recommended to seek guidance from a professional that is tailored to your specific circumstances. Please note that past performance is not a reliable indicator of future results. Make informed decisions as investing carries inherent risks.
Seeking guidance on managing your finances?
Take advantage of our complimentary financial tools that assist in monitoring your investments and devising a strategy to achieve your financial objectives.
Source: Zola, “Determining the Appropriate Budget for a Wedding Gift,” June 2023.